Home Entertainment 80+ Best Funny Birthday Quotes – [Sayings & Messages]

80+ Best Funny Birthday Quotes – [Sayings & Messages]

Funny Birthday Quotes: Finding the proper birthday messages or funny birthday quotes for friends to jot down in their greeting card will be difficult. However, there’s nothing more special than the gift of laughter. Therefore spread the enjoyment on their big day, with some funny birthday quotes.


I really like funny birthday quotes and sayings and I know others do also. Thus I’ve collected several of them here, simply to provide you with a laugh or two. With all that’s on your plate, I thought you’d enjoy something hilarious…

Funny Birthday Quotes


Read : 4th Of July Jokes

  • Wisdom doesn’t necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. – Tom Wilson
  • Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. – Jennifer Yane
  • Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. – Larry Lorenzoni
  • May you live to be a hundred years – With one extra year to repent.
  • The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. – Lucille Ball
  • Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time. – Jean Paul Richter
  • A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age. – Robert Frost
  • I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now.
  • You’re not 40, you’re eighteen with 22 years experience.

Funny Birthday Quotes for Best Friends


  •  I’m sixty years of age. That’s 16 Celsius. – George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
  • Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life. ~Herbert Asquith
  • Youth is a disease from which we all recover. – Dorothy Fulheim
  • First, you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly, and then you forget to unzip your fly. – Branch Rickey
  • Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. – Bob Hope
  • Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. – Truman Capote
  • Funny Birthday quotes
  • Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that’ll get you home earlier. – Dan Bennett
  • Just remember, once you’re over the hill you begin to pick up speed. – Charles Schulz, cartoonist
  • They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body.
  • When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. – Mark Twain
  •  The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. – Jerry M. Wright
  •  Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. – George Bernard Shaw
  • Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. – Sam Ewing

Funny Birthday Quotes Messages for Friends


  • Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. – Dave Barry, “Your Disintegrating Body,” Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
  • We know we’re getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it.
  • A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip.
  •  There is still no cure for the common birthday. – John Glenn
  •  Birthdays are like girlfriends, they come and go-unless you enjoy them.
  •  Growing old is mandatory but growing up is optional. – Chili Davis
  •  To me, old age is always 20 years older than I am.

Funny Birthday Quotes Messages for Sister Brother

Funny Birthday Quotes 2018
Funny Birthday Quotes, Messages, Sayings
  • You are only young once, but you can be immature for a lifetime.
  • If I’d known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself.
  •  Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.
  • Birthdays are nature’s way of telling us to eat more cake.
  •  Just remember, once you’re over the hill you begin to pick up speed.
  • The best birthdays of all are those that haven’t arrived yet.
  •  Looking fifty is great – if you’re sixty.
  • I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
  •  If we could be twice young and twice old we could correct all our mistakes.
  •  After 30, a body has a mind of its own.
  •  Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other never forgets them.

Funny Birthday Quotes For Her Him

Funny Birthday Quotes, Messages, Sayings

  • Men are like wine: some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age.
  • It is true that I was born in Iowa, but I can’t speak for my twin sister.
  •  When I was born I was so surprised I didn’t talk for a year and a half.
  • Live as long as you may. The first twenty years are the longest half of your life.
  •  When I turned two I was really anxious, because I’d doubled my age in a year. I thought if this keeps up, by the time I’m five I’ll be 64.

Funny Birthday Quotes for MOM DAD

funny birthday memes for best friend
Funny Birthday Quotes, Messages, Sayings
  • Thirty-five is a very attractive age; London society is full of women who have of their own free choice remained thirty-five for years.
  • Age is something that doesn’t matter unless you are a cheese.
  • About the only thing that comes to us without effort is old age.
  •  Time and Tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty.
  • “Birthdays are nature’s means of telling us to eat more cake .” – Unknown
  • “A diplomat is a person who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never recalls her age .” Robert Frost
  • “I’m at an age when my back goes out more often than I do .” Phyllis Diller
  • “You realize you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake .” Bob Hope
  • “For all the improvements in medicine, there is still no cure for the common birthday .” John Glenn ( Astronaut )
  • “Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. You look like a monkey, and you smell like one too .” Children’s birthday celebration song

Best Funny Birthday Sayings Quotes

Funny Birthday Wishes
Funny Birthday Quotes, Messages, Sayings
  • “Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never can remember birthdays and the other never forgets them .” Ogden Nash
  • “Birthdays are good for you. studies show that the people who have the most live the longest .” Rev. Larry Lorenzoni
  • “The simplest way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once .” H . Prochnow 
  • “Why was he/she born so beautiful. Why was she born at all? Because she had no say in it. No, say in it at all .” Children’s birthday celebration song 
  • “I believe in loyalty. Whenever a woman reaches an age she likes, she should stick with it .” Eva Gabor

 Not necessarily funny birthday quotes but funny quotes about age


  • “After 30, a body has a mind of its own .” Bette Midler
  • “The first hundred years are the hardest .” Wilson Mizner
  • “You grow up the day you have your first real laugh yourself .” Ethel Barrymore
  • “Looking fifty is great–if you’re sixty .” Joan Rivers
  • “The old believe everything; the middle-aged suspect everything; the young know everything. “ Oscar Wilde
  • “Pleas’d look forward, pleased to look behind, and count each birthday with a grateful mind .” Alexander Pope
  • “It takes a long time to grow young .” Pablo Picasso
  • “Getting old ain’t for sissies .” Betty Davis
  • funny birthday quotes
  • “Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter .” Mark Twain
  • “Some people reach the age of sixty before others .” Lord Hood

Funny Birthday Messages Quotes


  • “When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years .” Mark Twain
  • “Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age .” C. Joad
  • “Old age is not so bad when you consider the alternatives .” Maurice Chevalier
  • “The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left .” Jerry Wright
  • “Oh to be seventy again .” Georges Clemenceau, on seeing a pretty girl on his 80th birthday
  • “The older the fiddler, the sweeter the tune .” Pope Paul VI
  • “The best substitute for experience is being sixteen .” Raymond Duncan
  • “The secret to eternal youth is arrested development .” Alice Roosevelt Longworth
  • “And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years .” Abraham Lincoln


Funny Birthday Quotes and Sayings If you’re probing for some funny happy birthday quotes for brightening up someone’s big day realize there are numbers of the favorite funny birthday quotes. If you’re creating your own greetings cards, these happy birthday quotes are absolute to brighten up the within and bring delight to the recipient.

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